WAS IT A VERY GOOD YEAR? by GMD614@aol.com Disclaimers: The characters, nor the song, are mine. Just borrowing them for a bit. Rating: R Classification: MSR-Vignette Spoilers: Small Potatoes and anything that came before... Summary: A Post Eddie Van Blundht Institution visit story :) Comments are encouraged! "So, Scully was it a good year?" "Excuse me?" "The wine. Van Blundht. Good year?" Scully knew coming to see Van Blundht was a very bad idea from the start, but Mulder had been insistent. Now, as the car lurched forward into the flow of traffic, Scully was sure this was a conversation she did not want to have. "Drop it, Mulder." "Merlot, Chardonay, Chiante?" Mulder's eyes were fixed on the road, the lines of his face relaxed, and a slight smile played along his lips. Anyone else would have thought Mulder was having just another day, another car ride home from who-knows-where, with his partner at his side. Fortunately for Dana Scully, she could read Mulder like that old copy of Moby Dick Ahab had given her years ago. White knuckles gave him away. His hands clenched the wheel so tightly that his knuckles practically glowed and the muscles in his hands would probably ache for days...not to mention the incessant tapping of his left foot. "Chiante." "His choice or yours, Scully? I mean, was the bottle just laying around when he dropped by, or did he bring it over himself...you know, to set the mood?" "We're not doing this, Mulder. I won't do this." "We aren't doing anything, Scully." "Then nothing's changed, has it Mulder?" Her words were nasty and cutting, and she regretted them as they fell from her mouth, but she was unable to stop them. Scully was angry - at Van Blundht, at Mulder, but mostly at herself. Damn him, she thought. Why does it have to be like this? "I take that back, Mulder. Everything has changed, but I won't play these games with you. I can't. Promise me an honest conversation, and I'll cook you dinner. I don't want to battle you with inuendos in the car." "Should we stop for a bottle of wine?" She couldn't mistake the twinkle in his eyes. It was a peace offering Mulder-style, and suddenly the anger began to subside. XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx "I must say, Agent Scully, pathology is not your only specialty. That was delicious." "Why, thank you, Agent Mulder. Please, allow your gratitude to lead you to the sink where there are several pots and pans soaking." With familiar strains of music wafting into the kitchen from the sterio, Mulder and Scully washed and dried the dishes, and tidied up the kitchen. They spoke about everything and nothing all at once, never once bringing up work or Eddie Van Blundht. "Coffee, tea or something stronger? I warn you, however, that I'm out of orange juice concentrate." "Pathologist extraodinaire, master chef, AND comedian." Scully snapped him with the dish towel and dodged the spray of soapy water he splashed in her direction. It felt great to finally be at ease with Mulder again...to finally be at ease with Mulder period! She couldn't remember the last time they just goofed off - even if it was in avoidance of a more serious matter. They had both changed out of their business suits and into sweatpants and ratty, old t-shirts. Scully's hair was tucked behind her ears and Mulder's was tousled with that one disobedient lock curving onto his brow. They certainly were not the picture-perfect FBI agents, but rather two people disinterested in impressing the other. They had moved past that long, long ago. When Mulder turned the water off, the melody of THE WAY YOU LOOK TONIGHT sung by Sinatra reached them. Scully felt herself being pulled dramatically into Mulder's arms and he began to spin them around while singing off key. Someday, when I'm awfully low When the world is cold I will feel a glow just thinking of you And the way you look tonight Yes, you're lovely with your smile so warm And your cheek so soft There is nothing for me but to love you And the way you look tonight Spinning her out of his arms, they uncoiled filling the length of the kitchen. Just as their hands were about to unclasp, Mulder pulled her back in and caught her tighly against him. Scully was laughing so hard she could hardly breathe. He supported her with his arm around her back. Singing with all the feeling he could muster, and then some, Mulder continued to twirl her into the living room. With each word your tenderness grows Tearing my fears apart And that laugh that wrinkles your nose Touches my foolish heart Lovely never ever change Keep that breathless charm Won't you you please arrange it cause I love you Just the way you look tonight The weight of the words began to sink in and left both Mulder and Scully a bit dumbstruck. To his credit, Scully realized, Mulder kept their bodies pressed tightly together. The swaying slowed and their eyes locked in a soul-touching gaze. His eyes had never been so clear or so green before. They were blazing, tinged with an edge of gold. Scully felt her breath catch in her throat. He looked so young - like a teen-ager in love for the very first time. This was the boy he should have been 20 years ago. Scully felt sadness and joy all at once. She was angry that those experiences had been taken from him by THEM, yet she was thrilled to be the first woman on the other end of that gaze. Mulder couldn't tear his eyes from Scully's if his life was threatened. He was lost. He saw everything so clearly now. He saw with more than just his eyes. For the first time, his heart was seeing Dana Scully...without judgement, without fear, without jealousy or anxiety. It was only the most profound moment of his life. "Tell me he didn't kiss you." Scully was struck by the simplicity of the statement. "Scully? Tell me he didn't take this from me..." Mulder lowered his lips to hers and brushed across them with a feather-light touch. His eyes met hers again. "Tell me Van Blundht didn't steal our first kiss, Scully." Mulder's hands slid up to Scully's face and he pulled her to him, locking them in a passionate kiss. Scully pulled herself away needing to breathe and to think. "Mulder, sit with me and talk. We have to, before...anything else. Please?" "Honest conversation was part of the deal, wasn't it?" Mulder kissed her cheek and let her go. She headed to the kitchen, pulling a bottle of chiante off the wine rack. Mulder smiled. "Let's hope it's a good year, Scully." XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX Scully sat on the sofa next to Mulder handing him a glass of wine. He smiled as his hand lingered on hers for a moment longer than it should have and Scully felt the warm rush of blood blush her cheeks. She chuckled. "What's so funny?" "You made me blush, Mulder. My ears feel like they're on fire." "Your ears are on fire? Hmm, I thought that kiss would have heated you up in some other ways..." "Mulder." He sipped the wine and placed the glass on the coffee table. Slowly, he turned to face her, and took the wine glass from her hands, putting it next to his own. He raised her hand to his lips and, closing his eyes, pressed his lips to the backs of her fingers. Scully sighed and studied his face. He was nervous, that she could tell. His breathing was uneven and a little too shallow. The clarity she had seen in his eyes minutes ago was now clouding over with confusion and worry. She had to start this conversation before Mulder backed off. He spooked so easily where emotions were involved. "Eddie didn't kiss me, Mulder. Had it not been for your impecable timing, though..." "You had no idea it wasn't me?" "Oh, a little voice inside my head kept saying, 'Mulder is asking about my childhood? I wonder who's brainwashing him now?'" "I...Scully..." "Mulder, let me do this without interruption, okay? When I get it all out, you can have the floor." He released her hand and nodded his reply. "When I opened the door and saw who I thought to be you with a bottle of wine, I thought it was weird. I kept asking if you were all right. I thought something was wrong with your mother or perhaps Skinner or an informant had upset you. But you wanted to talk, or Eddie did, well, you know what I mean...It was awkward at first, but he didn't say much so I didn't realize something wasn't right. It was so refreshing to have someone really listening for a change." Mulder exhaled sharply, and opened his mouth to speak, but Scully silenced him with a soft kiss. "I'm not done yet," she smiled. "I wanted it to be you. I wanted you to see me as a woman, Mulder, not as an FBI Agent, or a Doctor. I wanted, I have wanted, to be romanced a little. Ed Jerse, Eddie Van Blundht - they were providing me with the one thing you wouldn't give, Mulder. Undivided attention. Even if it was just for a night, I needed to feel like a woman who is attractive to men. Do you understand?" "I'm sorry. I never knew you wanted that from me. I never thought I could do that for you without getting my ass kicked. You get so angry when I protect you, leave you behind, act like the man. I was afraid you'd laugh at me, then get pissed off and leave." "If you don't know by now that I'd never leave you, what have the last four and a half years been about, Mulder?" "You frighten me, Scully. You have no idea how much power you hold in your eyes, your touch, the gentle sway of your hips, that no-nonsense way you draw your weapon and yell, 'Freeze! Federal Agent!'" They laughed, as Scully once again blushed. Mulder traced her cheek bone with the tip of his forefinger and tucked a stray tendril of auburn hair behind her ear. "It's ironic that you don't feel like a woman around me when I fight with myself every minute I'm with you to forget you are the only woman. You have been the only woman, but it took your abduction for me to realize it. You drive me crazy, Dana." "Dana?" She wrinkled her nose. "Not from you. It's too weird." "So it's Scully, even now?" "Yes, Fox, it's Scully..." "Ok, Ok, I see your point." Sitting in silence, listening to the soft music, sipping wine like any two people on a Saturday night was the most incredible feeling to Scully. She couldn't remember ever feeling so relaxed. A tiny sigh escaped her mouth making Mulder that much more aware of her body so close to his. He shifted himself and pulled her to him, so that her head rested against his shoulder and his arm rested comfortably across the back of the sofa. "Scully, how do I do it?" "Do what?" "You know, how do I let you be a woman and an FBI Agent without upsetting you?" It seemed that every time Mulder opened his mouth, he said something that just endeared him to Scully even more...something she didn't think possible. "Trust me, Mulder." He looked down at her, turning her face to his with his fingers under her chin. "I do." "Trust yourself." "That's the part I have trouble with." "Talk to me." "It's hard." "I know, but it's the only way." "Help me, Scully." Scully felt the tears welling up in her eyes knowing how difficult this was for Mulder. The level of trust he he just placed in her, admitted to her, was astounding. It was one thing to hear the words but to feel their meaning was something else entirely. Shifting herself over him, Scully straddled his lap, resting her hands lightly on his shoulders. Her eyes met Mulder's in an intense and electric stare. They were speaking volumes without uttering a sound. It was the same communication that they'd used in many official situations as well. They had perfected it. "How can I help you, Mulder? What do you want me to do?" "Love me," he breathed. "I do love you, Mulder. Don't you know that?" Scully's hands could not be still. They roamed over his shoulders and neck. Her fingertips caressed the curve of his jaw and the lines of his face. Mulder could do nothing but breathe - and her scent intoxicated him. He was more aroused than he ever remembered being. It was more than a physical thing. Scully aroused his mind and his soul as well as his body. He was so alive and responsive to her every touch, her every move, her every word. His eyes slid closed and his head reeled. Had she really said the words? "Do you, Scully? Even after...everything?" "Oh, Mulder...especially after everything." Scully worked her hands under his t-shirt and gently caressed the plains of his chest sending wave after wave of excitement through Mulder's body. He was beyond all thought. For Mulder, there was only sensation...scent, touch, sound. Tears flowed steadily from Scully's eyes as she felt and saw the tensions leave Mulder's body. He was fighting so hard. Scully could see the struggle he waged not to lose the control he so valiantly fought to maintain. She loved this man. She loved him more deeply than any emotion she'd ever felt. "Tell me about Martha's Vineyard." "Wha...why?" Mulder's voice barely rose above a whisper and his eyes fluttered open. "Just tell me." "Uh...I remember...I remember sitting on the rocks...watching the boats. Our house was a little walk away from the shore, but I'd go and sit there...for hours, alone. I...I wouldn't think about anything. Just the boats, the water, the waves." Putting her arms around his neck, Scully pulled him onto her, stretching down the length of the sofa. They rolled to their sides, Mulder's back against the cushions, his arms holding her to him. Scully continued her ministrations as he spoke, coaxing the details of a lonely boy's life from him seemingly without his awareness. "My father couldn't ignore me there, on the rocks, on the beach. He didn't have to pretend...I didn't have to pretend he liked me. The gulls would squalk and dive, and I wished I could fly like they did." "Tell me about the sandlot games..." Slowly, Scully peeled away the layers of clothing separating her from Mulder, as he recalled the fragments of his childhood. When Scully sensed Mulder tensing from a difficult memory, she'd distract him from the pain by touching or kissing or cooing in his ear. Her hands roamed over his body, and Scully could feel the ripples of muscle under her fingertips. "...and we wouldn't think about heading home until the sun dropped behind the dunes. Mmmmm...oh, God, Scully...please..." "Oh, Mulder," she sighed. He pulled her underneath him, pressing his arousal against her hip. He kissed her with an urgency neither of them were prepared for. The languid, sensual tone of the evening - dinner, dancing, a bottle of wine, soft conversation - seemed years ago. Now, there was raw, hungry passion and need. But, just as suddenly as Mulder began the kiss, he ended it. "I'm sorry, Scully," he groaned breathlessly into her ear. "Sorry? What for?" "You wanted me to listen...and...and...all I did was..." Scully pushed him slightly off of her so she could look into his eyes. "Listen to me because I'm only saying this once. WE needed to talk. We needed to break free of all the barriers holding us firmly in our accepted roles. This isn't about ME, Mulder. It's about us together. You did listen to me tonight. Not my words but my gestures and my body. Never apologize for opening up and letting me in." "My head, Scully...I can't think..." "Then don't, Mulder. Let go...I won't let you fall." In one fluid motion, he was inside of her. The sudden pain of his entry was quickly abated with a fire Scully had only dreamed of experiencing. She called out his name and held onto him as he moved slowly within her. Shudders that rocked her body slowly subsided as the heat of her desire spread from her center to each nerve ending. "Scully, look at me." He met her smokey blue eyes and locked into them, pushing deeper and deeper into her with each long thrust. "I love you, Scully. God, I love you." "I know you do." XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX As the night turned to morning, the two agents slept as deeply as they had loved. When the sunlight streamed in and roused Scully from sleep, she couldn't resist watching Mulder, so vulnerable and peaceful. She didn't dare to move for fear of waking him. Thoughts of the previous night again brought tears to her eyes. He was so wounded in so many ways, and the wounds ran deep. Through his healing, they would both be healed. "The truth will save you, Scully. I think it will save the both of us," he had told her once. Little did she know how true those words would ring. "We'll be fine, Mulder. Just fine," she whispered into the curve of his neck. Mulder began to stir and wrapped himself more tightly around her petite form. Scully smiled and lost herself in passionate thoughts of the years to come. They will be very good years... THE END comments, comments, comments